I have been wanting to write more often recently, but have struggled to do so. Most of it has had to do with internal reasons, but I realized I have been making other excuses, like being too busy and feeling like I don’t have a very concise voice.
Perfectionism is a major issue for me in most of my creative pursuits, but especially in writing. I think the academic nature of writing draws out my fear of being judged by people more-so than music. I think criticism can be less subjective because of rules like spelling and grammar, so the consequences of making mistakes are greater.
Maybe it’s all in my head.
A few years ago I wrote a blog post every day for thirty days or so. I’m not going to try to replicate that, but what I am going to do is try not to filter myself as much. When I have an idea to write something, I’ll write it and post it before I talk myself out of it.
(Yes, I talk to myself.)
Sometimes I am my own worst enemy. I have let some ridiculous things keep me from posting my thoughts to this blog in the last few years. I am naming them in order to get them out in the open so they will hopefully no longer stop me:
- Post length (too long or too short)
- Subject (too specific or too generic)
- Fear of judgement about a subject
- Insecurity about knowledge of a subject
- Worry that no one will read, respond, or care
- Not having an image to go along with the post
Maybe only that last one is ridiculous, but they are all real reasons I have intentionally not clicked “Publish” on a post in the past.
Ideally I’d like to publish something at least once per week, but I will write whenever inspiration strikes and I have the time to put my thoughts/feelings into words.
PS – This post is 308 words.
I’ve used every single one of those reasons to avoid publishing a blog post.